Fandomstuck
by Eevee2glacia
Summary: "10 fandoms play a game." Warnings inside, T because I'm paranoid
1. WHO'S THIS DOUCHEBAG?

**Hello, this is my first fanfic on this site, I've been here for a while, I just haven't created any stories...I have no idea where (no idea how to spell that because I'm an idiot) this is going, aw well, lets see where this bullshit takes us**

**Please no flames, I know I'm an idiot, don't remind me of it**

**WARNING: Parings, personified fandoms, use of curse words, multiple character deaths, gay relationships, hate relationships, people being idiots, me being an idiot/bitch (BLUH BLUH), ultimately destroying the fourth wall, suckish fanfic writing, and constant rambling**

**Disclaimer: If I owned anything, why would I be writing a fanfic?**

* * *

_oh hey a line_

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A lone figure, with not a hair in site, dark gray skin, a blue tuxedo, white bow tie, and dark grey shoes, stands in front of a display screen that is cut into four sections, as he examines the screen, he finds the words to say. Finally he presents himself in a fashion that shows he means business.

"How do I compare the situation, to something that you should be able to comprehend?" The man finally says

"Oh how impolite, I should introduce myself, my name is Doc Anon, I shall be your host for this-"

Suddenly another interrupts him.

"Ahem,"

A girl appears behind him, her hair a deep dark blue, down in beautiful curls, pale skin caused by hours of indoor activities, completely white eyes, a blue scarf placed around her neck, baggy jeans that fit her perfectly, blue converses, and a dark blue t-shirt with a big white lower case t in the middle, arching her eyebrow at him.

"It seems, I shall not be able to host this session, goodbye dear readers," Doc Anon explains as he begins to abscond from the girl. The girl, after many moments of silence, speaks up. "Sorry you had to see that, Keep Calm and Continue Reading, folks,"

_Ok stop shitting around_

A young fandom stands alone in his room, it just so happens today, he will play a game called SFAN

What is the name of this young man?

== Enter name

IGNORANT PRICK X

TRY AGAIN SMARTASS

Oh come on, give him a real name

== Try again

HOMESTUCK ✓

Your name is HOMESTUCK, as mentioned before, you are about to play a game with 9 of your friends. You enjoy DRAWING and creating FLASHES. You enjoy reading a WEB COMIC your DAD created, in general you love COMICS. You hate ANGELS, specifically someone you know. You love spending your days on your HUSK TOP, that was made for especially for you. You enjoy causing SILLY SHENANIGANS where ever you go, but are not very good at it. You enjoy attempting to ART with your tablet, which is so a verb. You also enjoy dressing up as a TROLL, which you do so often, that getting gray paint on your skin is easy, fortunatley you do not have to do any effefort to put on a wig/die your hair, for it is naturally messy and black, you also have the pleasure of not having to put on fake horns on your head for you have real horns instead. However you hasel to put on color contacts everyday.

:33 Y0U TYP-3 11N 4 W4Y T)-(4T S-3-3MS 4NN0YS T)-(-3 L11VV11NG )-(-3LL 0UT 0F -3VV-3RY0N-3 (D-). Sadly, Pesterchum does not exsist, so you use your name as a user for your chat client, or the Fandom Linker, it is called the Linker for short.

What will you do?

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_LINE_

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**Ok, short first chapter, I got lazy at some point, sorry, I'll come up with a new chapter soon**

**Also I changed homestuck's typing quirk so it seemed more..."annoying"**


	2. BIRTHDAY? WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?

**BLUH **

**I need to do a new chapter! Craaaaaaaaaapppppp! I AM LATE**

**Also thank you for your reviews, favorites, and follows, I really don't deserve all of your love! **

**You guys are awesome (\・****ω・****`/) virtual hug to you all. Thank you for being patient**

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-I warned you about the lines bro-

* * *

==Homestuck: Swing from your lamp, hooting like a monkey.

Why?

Why would you do that?

That's even worse than what John, Dave, Jade, or Rose was command to do, combined.

But...

The shenanigans...

The hilarity...

The irony...

It all compels you-

NO YOU MUST NOT!

But you are so tempted to.

== Homestuck: look at near by picture

Ah! That would be a picture of you and some of your friends. Including your moirail, your kismes, your ex-matesprit (you still have a healthy friendship, though), your auspisticise, and some random girl your kismes always hangs around.

== Homestuck: look at various plushies scattered around the room.

You have a various plushies scattered about the room, including, your scalemates, Lemmonsnout and Pyralspite, who are just...hanging around, you suppose, your bunnies, which are tucked neatly into their designated boxes, your squiddles, which are just attaching themselves to each other all over the room, your Manthro Chaps which are completely scattered all over the room in a unorderly fashion, and your dad's Smuppets, which your dad just places all over your room and everywhere in the house to get on your nerves. Sometimes you cannot stand your dad! UGH!

== Homestuck: Have your daddy issues later, sweetheart, move on to the posters.

Ah your posters. They're mostly just posters of your dad's webcomic, with a few other posters of apocalyptic movies, really bad romance movies, and Nicolas Cage. You aren't exactly sure why you have the last one, actually. Oh well.

== Homestuck: Captchalogue the Nicolas Cage poster.

You would, but alas, you do not have a sylladex to captchalogue your poster. What an utter disappointment.

== Homestuck: See if your dad has one

WHAT!? NO! Even if he did, which you know he has quite a few, he would give you the crappiest one he had!

== Homestuck: Man up, it will probably be the only one you ever get!

Later, your dad isn't even home.

== Homestuck: Check calendar

Today happens to be the 13th of April-

Wait...

What?

Well it appears to be your birthday, with the release of a very popular beta lagging a bit behind.

Wait...that sounds like a familiar situation, you just don't know how...

== Homestuck: Where's the beta?

Oh it hasn't even arrived yet, damn it.

Unless...

Wait is the red flag thingy on your mailbox up?

== Homestuck: Look out the window.

Outside you see the red flag thingy on the mailbox up, and your dad's car is no where in sight. Great all you need to do is slip to the mailbox quickly and quietly...

Suddenly you are interrupted by a beeping coming from your computer. Someone is messaging you!

Linker Log:

HT began pestering HS

HT: Hey Homestuck

HT: I know you're probably busy

HT: but I really want to know when we're goIng to play the game

HT: The others are getting impatient

HT: And I don't know what to tell them

HT: Help!

HT: :?

HT: Homestuck

HT: Are you there?

HS: :33 S0RRY, 11 G0T 4 811T D11STR4CT-3D (D-)

HT: That's alright

HT: I know you're busy

HT: oh yeah!

HT: Happy birthday!

HS: :33 T)-(4NKS H-3T4! (D-)

HT: did you get your present from me?

HS: :33 L4T-3 L11K-3 T)-(-3 8-3T4

HS: W)-(-3N D11D Y0U S-3ND 4 PR-3S-3NT?

HT: 3 days ago

HT: when we where talkIng About it then, silly

HS: :33 WW-3 WW-3R-3? (D-)

HS: :33 11 GU-3SS-3 11 MUST'VV-3 8L4CK-3D 0UT 0R S0M-3T)-(11NG (D-)

HT: maybe

HT: but anyway

HT: I have to go

HT: my day's calling me for something, sorry dude

HS: :33 4WW, 0K (D-)

HS: :33 8UT C0M-3 84CK 0N 4S S00N 4S Y0U C4N (D-)

HS: :33 0K? (D-)

HT: don'T worry, I wILL :)

HT:

HS:

Ah how you love your Moirail, so.

== Homestuck: Rush back to the window

You quickly return to your window sill to view what has been happening while you were away

Your dad's car pulls up

DAMN IT!

== Homestuck: wait

You wait a while for your dad to go inside.

When you're sure he's inside, you make your way towards the door of your bed room, almost not noticing the note and the nicely folded t-shirt on the drawer.

== Homestuck: Look at note

YOU'VE GONE THIS FAR AND YOUR NOT AS CRAPPY AS EVERYONE ELSE SAYS

BUT YOU HAVE TO LOOK THE PART,

SO I GOT YOU A NEW T-SHIRT FOR YOU TO WEAR INSTEAD OF YOUR RAG OF A T-SHIRT

SO HAPPY BIRTHDAY,

I'M SO PROUD OF YOU.

-HUSSIE

You smile a bit at the note, yup, this is definitely from dad.

== Homestuck: discard old t-shirt and wear new one

You discard the old white t-shirt with the symbol you see upon installing SBURB and put on the new black t-shirt on with a long sleeve black turtle neck under it, and the SBURB logo on it.

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_I warned you!_

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**Well another chapter done! **

**Phew, that one took awhile**

**Forgive me if I misspelled anything.**

**I'm going to go read other fan fiction and sleep now**


	3. ENGLISH MAILBOX

Seeing your reviews made me realize,  
It is my duty as an authoress to update  
And I haven't been doing my duty  
For that I'm truly sorry  
But I am now here, with a update

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_THis is just a linE, Creepy Ain't it? Killing pErfectly InuSAbLe space, but In rEtrospect, that sentence seemed a bit random didn't it?_

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==Homestuck: Go into the hall way  
You quietly open the door and slip into the hall way, various portraits of a single man...er green skeleton are scattered about.

==Homestuck: Who's this douchebag  
This is no simple douchebag  
This douchebag is an asshole who's sole purpose in life, you swear to god this was, was to confuse and scare the living hell out of you.  
and this asshole's name is Lord English  
Under each portrait is a piece of paper that says, HOW CAN YOU HIDE FROM ME, WHEN I'M ALREADY THERE?  
Your dad put those up to completely freak you out. But the pieces of paper do speak the truth, considering everything and everyone is Lord  
English, of course.

== Homestuck: Go down the hall way to the stairs.  
You walk down the dim lighted hallway and cautiously down the stairs, reminding yourself to be careful of the stairs.

== Homestuck: look around the living room.  
You have a simple living room with a couch, a fireplace with the ashes of a dead relative, which, you're not sure is normal, a rug, and a large present next to the couch...  
Oh wait that must be for you

== Homestuck: Open present  
You open the present to see a giant Karkat plushie  
Oh wow  
Your dad  
Is  
awesome!

For the moment

== Homestuck: Look at ashes  
The ashes are kept in a urn above the fireplace, and above them, is a picture of your dead older brother, Problem Sleuth.  
You love your brother, he was such a cool and nice guy.  
Sometimes your Dad stops by the fireplace and just stands there, looking at the picture of your brother.  
There's something you both have in common  
You both miss Problem Sleuth dearly.  
Your Dad was so broken hearted about it, he won't even tell you why Problem Sleuth died

== Homestuck: is your dad in the kitchen  
No, of course not, he's in his room...  
OR SO YOU THINK  
Maybe he might be playing a mind game on you, causing you to believe he's in his room when really he's in the kitchen thus ruining your theory

==  
GASP  
Clever clever man

== Homestuck: go outside  
What for?  
OH YEAH  
THE BETA  
How could you possibly forget that

==  
You rush to the door immediately, opening it slowly, so your Dad does not know you just went out

== Homestuck: Check the windows of the car.  
You quickly hurry over to your dad's car to see inside it, there is a black package on top of a few other things, such as the envelope with the SDOM logo...  
WAIT A SECOND  
THERE'S THE GAME

== Homestuck: Break the window; grab your prize  
Nope  
Your dad will be PISSED  
He will only kill your favorite characters and make them suffer further  
You don't want that

== Homestuck: Check mailbox  
You check the mailbox  
It's fucking empty

==  
When the day is bright  
But the streets are empty  
It is a bright spring's day  
And the only companion you have is the wind and the sun  
That is when you know something is not right  
But do not stress nor fear the day  
For it is only the beginning of the adventure  
-John Egbert  
You were sure it was John Egbert  
(Spoilers: it's not)

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_Shall I compare thee to a apocalyptic game?_

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Ok one douchebag down  
I'm going to the next the next chapter  
I will give you a cookie for the person who guesses who it is  
I'll give you a hint  
I†'s †his doucheb✰g


End file.
